WHERE ARE YOU, THE POST CODE IS NOT RECOGNISED?

ARGYLL VILLAGE LIFE: 1

Do you have this problem? You have a post code awarded to your dwelling by a beneficent Post Office, but you live rurally — in my case, Argyll, the land of the Gael, in an especially beautiful corner of Scotland. I live in a wonderful small village in a glen renowned as not only astonishingly and scenically exceptional, but also of great historic importance as a centre for west coast peoples for thousands of years.

Our unique village does not have street names, only areas. We live at number 7. There are three number 7’s in our village, which confuses many (but not our local postpersons!), and it is important to make clear in which part of the village one’s number lies.

Further fun has been added by American giant Google (or Alphabet, to give it its proper name), for the lane in which we live has no name — other than the local one of ‘Pauper’s Row’, as we live in what was considered ‘the poor end of the village’. The more recent twentieth century extension of the village at the end of our lane is known as Castle Park, built as it was in the former grazing land surrounding the Castle. However, Google Maps attributes this name to our nameless lane, but also shows our home as the wrong number 7! So far, so mildly irritating.

However, because of our rural setting, many purchases are made online to avoid long trips to the city, and trying to negotiate the intricacies of the multitude of different website address requirements can be tiring and frustrating, particularly when they insist on a street name. We put the village name as the street address as our home is located in the older area of the village. Other 7’s can amplify the address with the name of their area, although the lack of any signage to indicate anything of the sort adds to the overall hilarity.

In trying to order a pair of physiotherapist-recommended trainers for my ageing feet, the website insisted on my street address first, then the house number. This was unacceptable. So I put the house number with the village name, which was also deemed incorrect. Adding the house number again made it look like I lived at No 77, which could exceed the number of houses in the Glen, let alone the village. Then came the cruncher… “Your post code is not recognised, please re-enter to continue.” In a mere 15 minutes of wrestling with many alternative configurations of the identical information, the website eventually relented and allowed me to continue and pay for the desired footwear. 

I regularly get messages from Royal Mail or other carriers telling me that my address is incomplete and would I contact them with the correct information, (although I suspect these messages are a scam), most of my deliveries arrive promptly, even if they are occasionally delivered to the wrong number 7.

Of such small things are our “lives of quiet desperation” filled.